i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
