playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
