Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
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