Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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