This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
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