im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Is this like a preordered booty call?
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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