I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
i dont even know how to be here
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize