So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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