fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
