Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
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