Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
And then my night got REAL pukey
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
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