Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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