imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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