just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
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