We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
