they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Randomize
