He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Me too!
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Randomize
