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Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
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