Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Randomize