How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
