Buhtt sex?
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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