He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
