I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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