Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Randomize
