do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize
