I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Don't EVER smell your tampon
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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