We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I deserve this hangover.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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