margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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