He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
