Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize