You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
He felt like a one man threesome
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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