Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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