Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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