Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
I currently don't understand fingers.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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