your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Randomize