so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Randomize
