You're so nebulous sometimes
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
