I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Randomize
