**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
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