You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize