Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
