who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
