Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
