Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
