I need help removing her.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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