i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
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