I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
