so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
Randomize
