so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
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