did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
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