Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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